Maxwell Smart

Maxwell Smart, agent 86, is CONTROL's top spy, or at least that's what he would tell you. His origins, however, are shrouded in mystery. As a spy, much of his personal information must be considered classified, which is why there's so little of it.

Physically, Max is 5'9" and weighs 150 pounds. His salary as a CONTROL agent is $35,000.

He was born in 1930 in Washington, D.C. and delivered by Dr. Linquist. The exact date is unclear, but since his Zodiac sign is Scorpio, it must be between October 22nd and November 22nd. Max was raised in Washington and considers himself a "city boy."

Little is known about Max's family. He has an Aunt Bertha and Uncle Abner, who are the only relatives of his that we ever see. Other relatives that are mentioned are Uncle Harry and Aunt Rose, cousin Harvey the cab driver, and another cousin who sells used cars. His mother is still alive because he sends her $15 a week. Max also has/had a brother, because he once locked Max in a closet for three hours.

He went into the Army and served in the Korean War, where he reached the rank of corporal. His best friend from the Army is Sid Krimm.

Max has never done anything other than spy, as he was recruited right out of college by CONTROL as a "bonus baby spy." He joined CONTROL to "fight the forces of evil and serve on the side of niceness." Besides, he needed the money.

He wasn't a big success at spy school, failing Torture three straight years. He also failed out of Spy Music School. Somehow, he graduated and became a full-fledged agent, though within two weeks of his start the Chief had become bald.

As a spy, Max was an unqualified success. He won the Spy of the Year Award in two straight years (1965 & 1966). He also was voted "one of the ten best dressed spies." That probably led to his posing for Popular Espionage Magazine. He also was hired to endorse the Handy-Dandy Pocket Decoder for True Impossible Spy Stories Monthly. Max is also in charge of CONTROL's Medical Security Division.

Max's idol was Herb Gaffer, the legendary Agent 4. Like his idol, Max keeps a diary with accounts of all of his exploits.

For hobbies, Max plays poker every Saturday night, or he did when he was a bachelor. He also enjoys chess with the Chief, plays the bongos, and likes scuba diving. Max played on CONTROL's baseball and bowling teams and also organizes the Spy Frolics every year.

He smokes cigarettes and enjoys liquor. He likes to have a Gibson before dinner every night.

Max has an impressive knowlege of languages, speaking French, Spanish, German, Mandarin Chinese, and Swahili. He is a trained karate expert and holds the CONTROL Spy School's gold medal in the high jump.

Max lives in Apartment #86 in the Cherry Arms Apartments (Thanks Will) in Washington, D.C. His landlady is Harriet Doodeley. Among his neighbors are Mrs. Dawson and the Farkas'. His apartment is extremely neat, with every personal item in its own drawer.

Max's big weakness occurs during the night. He has to sleep with the light on because he's scared of gollywoggles. In fact, the only thing that scares him more than gollywoggles is lightning. To help him sleep, Max has a teddy bear.

Though Max fancies himself a ladies man, he is rarely seen playing the field. From the moment he began working with 99, there was an attraction between them. It took years and a near-death experience for Max to realize the depths of his feelings and propose to 99. Once married, Max is a typical jealous husband who would never entertain the thought of cheating on 99.

Max's apartment is crammed full of protective devices, including:


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Copyright 1995-2001 Carl Birkmeyer